With this it starts...the rest of days.

Thinking is perhaps something I do everyday. Maybe not thinking...more philosophizing. Maybe too much.

Today's topic is the whole topic about consumption. When we are bored, we can be distracted by consuming things other people have created, like games or TV shows. Another way is to create, such as writing this blog =). Now, both of them distract, although consumption is much easier than creation. However, creation could last forever, while consumption depends on the creation of another entity.

Which is probably another indication I should get back to writing as a means of distraction instead of reading, no matter how easy and how pleasurable it is.

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I'm starting to agree, that relationships are infernally difficult to start. Hell, do I even want one? Heh, like that comedian said, Bachelorhood is like a balance between loneliness and Euphoria. Loneliness right before you go to bed, euphoria at any other time. I know I know, it's biased, and its not my opinion, but it's still funny.

But seriously, to settle for a substandard relationship would probably not be my style, whatever that means (what is a substandard relationship anyways?). Nothing except true love! Even when True Love has no direct meaning. A soulmate? What happens when you don't believe in souls? =P How about a partner that complements you emotionally, intellectually and physically?
Ha. I'm so idealistic about this concept that most people probably won't understand why I'm such a cynic/realist in other areas of life. I don't know. But the topic of love have always been an interesting and dear subject. Just like human interaction and people stories. It's almost as if I'm two different people in one body. One that's coolly rational/cynical and the other idealistic and humanitarian. For the first 18 years of my life, the coolly rational has dominated my mind. These past 3 years though, the idealistic one has began to assert itself. It may seem that I've been embittered by Engineering, but that's not the case. It's just the idealistic personality asserting itself. I blame my MPD on being born on the cusp I was born on and that I was a premie.

Anyways...that's enough writing for tonight. Heh...I kinda do wish my blog was actually long enough to go all the way back to high school. That way I could see and look back on what happened in high school and junior high. Yearning for the past. Grasping at the future. Sigh. And Struggling in the present. Fun life 'tis is. Fun life indeed.

Maybe this is just symptoms from a bigger problem. Perhaps. I think I need a life purpose. People say that's more time and that we're young. Perhaps, but the lack of a life purpose might really cause all these problems. Sigh. Whatever.

To seek our solace in the little death that claims us each night...is almost like an escape from reality. But that shall be what I'll be doing tonight. A good night to all and to all a good night.