I think people are becoming more busy and are not reading as much blogs. So this post will be short. (After all, I got a presentation tomorrow).
Visit my Johari window. Make your own and post your link. I'll fill it out.
Johari window is basically like a survey of what people think your traits are. Interesting to know.
http://kevan.org/johari?name=riellanart
Anyways. Night!
Bomber tomorrow!
Wednesday, March 29, 2006
Saturday, March 25, 2006
The mundane and the mystical
Well. I wasted an entire day. Let see though. 2 labs due. 2 more labs due. 2 presentations to critique and a FYDP presentation to create. Definately not impossible, but definately not that fun. Add to that homework and the like and you wonder why I'm still unmotivated.
Sometimes people in general piss me off. They complain incessantly about things that doesn't make sense. I complain, but at least I usually have cause. The arguments that some people make just doesn't make sense to me. And they annoy me to no end.
I guess I may be a hypocrite in this area. Sigh.
I find it amusing that I feel so much Angst now. Most people feel this indecision and this lost sense of direction in puberty and in high school. Most people by now know what they want to do and set out to do it. I find myself lost and without a direction. It's kind of sad in a way.
Searching through wikipedia randomly is always fun. Today's topic is soulmates. I particularly like the theory about twin flames. That there is only one true soulmate in the world. Someone also wrote that the danger is not in finding your soulmate, but rather accepting your soulmate for who he/she is. Of course, this theory might be so special to me because of my desire to be someone special in someone's eyes, and my desire to have somebody be a special someone to me.
See, if you are special and unique to somebody and vice versa, it can be used as a justification to your existence, or a reason of why you are here. I know, this theory is perhaps very selfish in what it does, but doesn't everyone want to be special to somebody? I find it hard to believe that people are so narcissistic that they can only love themselves. If they are so narcissistic that they can only love themselves, it's like a rat race. No matter how hard they try, it is ultimately pointless.
But the danger of the twin flame theory...what happens if you meet your twin flame and not know it. You like them drift by, like two ships parting in the sea. A slight glance, a significant look...how can you tell? No signs from above unfortunately. And is it our life goal to search for this person? What if luck and chance was not on your side?
===========================================
Society and technological progress. What is it's purpose?
It is to reduce random chance and allow us to control probability to a certain extent.
Is our lives better because of technology? Not really. According to anthropology, hunter-gatherer societies work a total of 23 hours a week, whereas we work almost 40. Their lives are more rich, culturally and socially. Yet, with our technology, we have less famines, less chance to starve to death. But we die more from lifestyle choices and pollution and car crashes and etc. When someone gets a disease in a hunter-gatherer, it's mostly up to luck to save them. When we get a disease, its mostly up to luck to hope we have a easily treatable disease. If not, we can still switch out organs, but that's still up in the air because that may fail. All our society and technology has accomplished is rounding off probability for those that know how to abuse the system. For others, it means longer hours without any gain.
So technology just means more people, a increase in chance, a decrease in probability, a decrease in luck and a decrease in fate and a decrease in destiny. No wonder our lives are so boring. It is because of our technology and society that star-crossed lovers no longer occur. Too bad =/.
Sometimes people in general piss me off. They complain incessantly about things that doesn't make sense. I complain, but at least I usually have cause. The arguments that some people make just doesn't make sense to me. And they annoy me to no end.
I guess I may be a hypocrite in this area. Sigh.
I find it amusing that I feel so much Angst now. Most people feel this indecision and this lost sense of direction in puberty and in high school. Most people by now know what they want to do and set out to do it. I find myself lost and without a direction. It's kind of sad in a way.
Searching through wikipedia randomly is always fun. Today's topic is soulmates. I particularly like the theory about twin flames. That there is only one true soulmate in the world. Someone also wrote that the danger is not in finding your soulmate, but rather accepting your soulmate for who he/she is. Of course, this theory might be so special to me because of my desire to be someone special in someone's eyes, and my desire to have somebody be a special someone to me.
See, if you are special and unique to somebody and vice versa, it can be used as a justification to your existence, or a reason of why you are here. I know, this theory is perhaps very selfish in what it does, but doesn't everyone want to be special to somebody? I find it hard to believe that people are so narcissistic that they can only love themselves. If they are so narcissistic that they can only love themselves, it's like a rat race. No matter how hard they try, it is ultimately pointless.
But the danger of the twin flame theory...what happens if you meet your twin flame and not know it. You like them drift by, like two ships parting in the sea. A slight glance, a significant look...how can you tell? No signs from above unfortunately. And is it our life goal to search for this person? What if luck and chance was not on your side?
===========================================
Society and technological progress. What is it's purpose?
It is to reduce random chance and allow us to control probability to a certain extent.
Is our lives better because of technology? Not really. According to anthropology, hunter-gatherer societies work a total of 23 hours a week, whereas we work almost 40. Their lives are more rich, culturally and socially. Yet, with our technology, we have less famines, less chance to starve to death. But we die more from lifestyle choices and pollution and car crashes and etc. When someone gets a disease in a hunter-gatherer, it's mostly up to luck to save them. When we get a disease, its mostly up to luck to hope we have a easily treatable disease. If not, we can still switch out organs, but that's still up in the air because that may fail. All our society and technology has accomplished is rounding off probability for those that know how to abuse the system. For others, it means longer hours without any gain.
So technology just means more people, a increase in chance, a decrease in probability, a decrease in luck and a decrease in fate and a decrease in destiny. No wonder our lives are so boring. It is because of our technology and society that star-crossed lovers no longer occur. Too bad =/.
Thursday, March 23, 2006
With this it starts...the rest of days.
Thinking is perhaps something I do everyday. Maybe not thinking...more philosophizing. Maybe too much.
Today's topic is the whole topic about consumption. When we are bored, we can be distracted by consuming things other people have created, like games or TV shows. Another way is to create, such as writing this blog =). Now, both of them distract, although consumption is much easier than creation. However, creation could last forever, while consumption depends on the creation of another entity.
Which is probably another indication I should get back to writing as a means of distraction instead of reading, no matter how easy and how pleasurable it is.
=============================================================
I'm starting to agree, that relationships are infernally difficult to start. Hell, do I even want one? Heh, like that comedian said, Bachelorhood is like a balance between loneliness and Euphoria. Loneliness right before you go to bed, euphoria at any other time. I know I know, it's biased, and its not my opinion, but it's still funny.
But seriously, to settle for a substandard relationship would probably not be my style, whatever that means (what is a substandard relationship anyways?). Nothing except true love! Even when True Love has no direct meaning. A soulmate? What happens when you don't believe in souls? =P How about a partner that complements you emotionally, intellectually and physically?
Ha. I'm so idealistic about this concept that most people probably won't understand why I'm such a cynic/realist in other areas of life. I don't know. But the topic of love have always been an interesting and dear subject. Just like human interaction and people stories. It's almost as if I'm two different people in one body. One that's coolly rational/cynical and the other idealistic and humanitarian. For the first 18 years of my life, the coolly rational has dominated my mind. These past 3 years though, the idealistic one has began to assert itself. It may seem that I've been embittered by Engineering, but that's not the case. It's just the idealistic personality asserting itself. I blame my MPD on being born on the cusp I was born on and that I was a premie.
Anyways...that's enough writing for tonight. Heh...I kinda do wish my blog was actually long enough to go all the way back to high school. That way I could see and look back on what happened in high school and junior high. Yearning for the past. Grasping at the future. Sigh. And Struggling in the present. Fun life 'tis is. Fun life indeed.
Maybe this is just symptoms from a bigger problem. Perhaps. I think I need a life purpose. People say that's more time and that we're young. Perhaps, but the lack of a life purpose might really cause all these problems. Sigh. Whatever.
To seek our solace in the little death that claims us each night...is almost like an escape from reality. But that shall be what I'll be doing tonight. A good night to all and to all a good night.
Today's topic is the whole topic about consumption. When we are bored, we can be distracted by consuming things other people have created, like games or TV shows. Another way is to create, such as writing this blog =). Now, both of them distract, although consumption is much easier than creation. However, creation could last forever, while consumption depends on the creation of another entity.
Which is probably another indication I should get back to writing as a means of distraction instead of reading, no matter how easy and how pleasurable it is.
=============================================================
I'm starting to agree, that relationships are infernally difficult to start. Hell, do I even want one? Heh, like that comedian said, Bachelorhood is like a balance between loneliness and Euphoria. Loneliness right before you go to bed, euphoria at any other time. I know I know, it's biased, and its not my opinion, but it's still funny.
But seriously, to settle for a substandard relationship would probably not be my style, whatever that means (what is a substandard relationship anyways?). Nothing except true love! Even when True Love has no direct meaning. A soulmate? What happens when you don't believe in souls? =P How about a partner that complements you emotionally, intellectually and physically?
Ha. I'm so idealistic about this concept that most people probably won't understand why I'm such a cynic/realist in other areas of life. I don't know. But the topic of love have always been an interesting and dear subject. Just like human interaction and people stories. It's almost as if I'm two different people in one body. One that's coolly rational/cynical and the other idealistic and humanitarian. For the first 18 years of my life, the coolly rational has dominated my mind. These past 3 years though, the idealistic one has began to assert itself. It may seem that I've been embittered by Engineering, but that's not the case. It's just the idealistic personality asserting itself. I blame my MPD on being born on the cusp I was born on and that I was a premie.
Anyways...that's enough writing for tonight. Heh...I kinda do wish my blog was actually long enough to go all the way back to high school. That way I could see and look back on what happened in high school and junior high. Yearning for the past. Grasping at the future. Sigh. And Struggling in the present. Fun life 'tis is. Fun life indeed.
Maybe this is just symptoms from a bigger problem. Perhaps. I think I need a life purpose. People say that's more time and that we're young. Perhaps, but the lack of a life purpose might really cause all these problems. Sigh. Whatever.
To seek our solace in the little death that claims us each night...is almost like an escape from reality. But that shall be what I'll be doing tonight. A good night to all and to all a good night.
Wednesday, March 22, 2006
With a laugh and with a cough. I think I'm mostly better.
Wee...clean bill of health. That is good.
Overthinking again. This is bad.
Ow...my head hurts. So here's the thing. I've been thinking about too many things lately, and reading wikipedia only makes me think more. I have always thought that thinking is always a good thing, but now I can also see the advantages to just zone out for a while. Hence, the attraction of brainless television and the like.
So what is it that I'm thinking about? I'm not sure. Like I have said so often before, I'm unsatified with the way my life has turned out right now. Yet I'm uncertain as how to change it. Many paths are blocked by existing barriers that require large amount of effort to get passed. I have enough effort and influence to only get through maybe one of these obstacles. However, as I am uncertain which barrier would benefit me the most, I have avoiding changing anything right now.
I think I would love to just spent one day at a bookstore or library with the books I want where I can just sit down and read. I haven't read anything good in a long while. And I haven't been writing anything either. It's like my inspiration has dried up or something.
Ugh....this lack of contentment and restlessness is driving me crazy.
On the plus side, I am better. Which means a deluge of work. Wigh.
Overthinking again. This is bad.
Ow...my head hurts. So here's the thing. I've been thinking about too many things lately, and reading wikipedia only makes me think more. I have always thought that thinking is always a good thing, but now I can also see the advantages to just zone out for a while. Hence, the attraction of brainless television and the like.
So what is it that I'm thinking about? I'm not sure. Like I have said so often before, I'm unsatified with the way my life has turned out right now. Yet I'm uncertain as how to change it. Many paths are blocked by existing barriers that require large amount of effort to get passed. I have enough effort and influence to only get through maybe one of these obstacles. However, as I am uncertain which barrier would benefit me the most, I have avoiding changing anything right now.
I think I would love to just spent one day at a bookstore or library with the books I want where I can just sit down and read. I haven't read anything good in a long while. And I haven't been writing anything either. It's like my inspiration has dried up or something.
Ugh....this lack of contentment and restlessness is driving me crazy.
On the plus side, I am better. Which means a deluge of work. Wigh.
Tuesday, March 21, 2006
Wow. Sick for a record....15 days
Well... Actaully. not a continuous 15 day run of something. But more like getting hit by a cold for 7 days. then 2 days of decent living. then another 7 days of getting hit with a sore throat + cough. The coughs were especially bad. Kept me up even when I lay down to try to sleep. Now though, its good. It doesn't hurt when I swallow.
Anyways. Saw several episodes of Good Eats, which is a pretty interesting show. Got some interesting music from Colleen. Natalie Imbruglia is actually pretty good. On the other hand...Westlife sounds so...bland. Got Melty Blood, which is interesting as a fighting game. Now if I actually have controllers...
Got so much to do...and so much I don't want to do. Several labs, rewrite FYDP proposals.. make sure that it's actually feasible... Gotta choose courses that would decide what I'll do for the rest of my life...
Damn....sometimes I wonder why I chose EE. Then again...there isn't much things that are good besides it.
Anyways. Saw several episodes of Good Eats, which is a pretty interesting show. Got some interesting music from Colleen. Natalie Imbruglia is actually pretty good. On the other hand...Westlife sounds so...bland. Got Melty Blood, which is interesting as a fighting game. Now if I actually have controllers...
Got so much to do...and so much I don't want to do. Several labs, rewrite FYDP proposals.. make sure that it's actually feasible... Gotta choose courses that would decide what I'll do for the rest of my life...
Damn....sometimes I wonder why I chose EE. Then again...there isn't much things that are good besides it.
Thursday, March 16, 2006
More understandable post
Let see, following today's nonsensical rant, I must admit I was feeling a bit under the weather. I am still feeling a bit under the weather, but at least I think I will make sense now.
Life. It is annoyingly unsatisfying because that is the nature of it. We always want what we don't have. And what is the point of it? It seems pointless, like MMORPGs, where we're striving for something we want, but don't necessarily need. Maybe changing the way we think would be good? But how much changing before we become something other than ourselves? And then, why do we always feel so lost? I have friends that have suddenly developed a new sense of being lost (whether that was from the alcohol that we have now started to consume) or other friends writing "Answer me God, where are the answers that I seek? " (even though he's not religious).
Maybe we are not distracting ourselves enough from these questions. I mean, with modern society, we hardly fight for our right to survive anymore. It used to be that consumed all of your thoughts. In this society, we force ourselves to be distracted to make meaning in our lives. Books, games, rituals, etc, all serve as distractions. Maybe we think too much. We think of what we want and need and most people don't know exactly what we want or need. So they make stuff up in order to fit in or to fill an empty hole of not knowing what they want or need.
Feelings, emotions, commitments....are they neccesary? Is the whole thing about needing somebody actually true? Can't a person exist alone? Besides, how would you know that you'd meet the right person. How would you know if you already have met her? Heh. You never know do you. I wonder if we are really just the pawn pieces in a colossal game between powers we don't understand.
And not just meeting the right person. How would you know if your life was well lived? After fulfilling every dream, what else does a person have? In that case, are people just made of dreams? Maybe we should strive for things we'll never achieve. That way, at least we'll have something to live for.
To those who dream, I salute thee.
Kevin
Life. It is annoyingly unsatisfying because that is the nature of it. We always want what we don't have. And what is the point of it? It seems pointless, like MMORPGs, where we're striving for something we want, but don't necessarily need. Maybe changing the way we think would be good? But how much changing before we become something other than ourselves? And then, why do we always feel so lost? I have friends that have suddenly developed a new sense of being lost (whether that was from the alcohol that we have now started to consume) or other friends writing "Answer me God, where are the answers that I seek? " (even though he's not religious).
Maybe we are not distracting ourselves enough from these questions. I mean, with modern society, we hardly fight for our right to survive anymore. It used to be that consumed all of your thoughts. In this society, we force ourselves to be distracted to make meaning in our lives. Books, games, rituals, etc, all serve as distractions. Maybe we think too much. We think of what we want and need and most people don't know exactly what we want or need. So they make stuff up in order to fit in or to fill an empty hole of not knowing what they want or need.
Feelings, emotions, commitments....are they neccesary? Is the whole thing about needing somebody actually true? Can't a person exist alone? Besides, how would you know that you'd meet the right person. How would you know if you already have met her? Heh. You never know do you. I wonder if we are really just the pawn pieces in a colossal game between powers we don't understand.
And not just meeting the right person. How would you know if your life was well lived? After fulfilling every dream, what else does a person have? In that case, are people just made of dreams? Maybe we should strive for things we'll never achieve. That way, at least we'll have something to live for.
To those who dream, I salute thee.
Kevin
To covet what we do not have.
I think it is human nature that we want what we do not have. And having it, lose interest in it just as quickly. I think that may be my feelings towards everything. You know what then? This life is now officially pointless. We strive for things that we don't really want, and yearn for things we don't really need.
I think what I lack the most, is memory. That may be why I don't care for many things. After all, if memory is the only measure of the fact that you strived for something or that you want something, a lack of memory would mean that whatever you strive for would be forgotten by the time you achieve it.
I don't know what I'm saying. I'm still kind of sick.
So what exactly am I griping about?
The fact that life almost never goes according to plan. I mean, seriously, what the hell was I thinking when I went into Engineering. But then again, what would I have gone into if it wasn't Engineering. I don't exactly what I want in life. Every post previous to this? Probably nonsense. I don't know, with any certainty, of what I want to do with my life. I envy those that know what they want to do with their lives, or those who know who they want to spend their life with, those that know the reason for life, or those that have a general plan for their lives. What, who, why and how. The when and where, that's up to fate.
I don't know why I'm unsatisfied with life. I can't seem to pinpoint a reason. And the next person that mentions that this is because of a lack of religion, religion is to me, a crutch. It does not explain away anything besides serving as a distraction, like video games, stories and what not.
I think I'm too easy distracted. This entire post is fragmented. Information and truth is pure. Maybe I should dedicate my life towards that?
I don't know. I just don't know.
I think what I lack the most, is memory. That may be why I don't care for many things. After all, if memory is the only measure of the fact that you strived for something or that you want something, a lack of memory would mean that whatever you strive for would be forgotten by the time you achieve it.
I don't know what I'm saying. I'm still kind of sick.
So what exactly am I griping about?
The fact that life almost never goes according to plan. I mean, seriously, what the hell was I thinking when I went into Engineering. But then again, what would I have gone into if it wasn't Engineering. I don't exactly what I want in life. Every post previous to this? Probably nonsense. I don't know, with any certainty, of what I want to do with my life. I envy those that know what they want to do with their lives, or those who know who they want to spend their life with, those that know the reason for life, or those that have a general plan for their lives. What, who, why and how. The when and where, that's up to fate.
I don't know why I'm unsatisfied with life. I can't seem to pinpoint a reason. And the next person that mentions that this is because of a lack of religion, religion is to me, a crutch. It does not explain away anything besides serving as a distraction, like video games, stories and what not.
I think I'm too easy distracted. This entire post is fragmented. Information and truth is pure. Maybe I should dedicate my life towards that?
I don't know. I just don't know.
Tuesday, March 14, 2006
What's been happening lately?
Let see, friday was 3BE, 3B class appreciation night. That was very fun. We arrived late because Lan, Darren and I was out on a mission to get alcohol for the event that night. We arrived at 3BE, which was at the cove, half an hour later then expected. Cove is the campus arcade and had many different games. However, the one most appreciated was the LAN network of CS. Yes, we could have played DDR, or the arcade games, but nothing says class unity like getting shot in the back by one of your classmates, and then killing them with a sniper rifle the round after. It was especially interesting that one of our profs, Professor Harder, was one of the participants. Although he is in the reserves, he wasn't very good at the game, even though he was a very computer oriented guy (he teaches coding). It was damn entertaining to see games where you can shoot your professor in the back.
I also won a T-shirt as one of the raffle draws. This occured right after I was looking at my ticket and saying that I had no chance. This was witnessed by Allen, who said that I was a very wrong man. I took his ticket and said the same thing (saying that his ticket had no chance) and he won a $25 dollar gift certificate right after. This did not work a third time for my other friend.
After that, I felt that I was drained and didn't want to go to Rev like we planned. Instead we went to Lan's place and had a few of the beers that we bought. David complained that we ditched him at this point. But I have to disagree. Since he was walking in front of us with Jane, the situation was that he ditched us and that he had no right to be angry. He said that he was searching for us for quite a while, but still his fault for walking too fast when you don't know the destination. After the drinking, we played around 2-3 hours of Smash Bros, before we went to sleep.
On saturday, I actually slept until 7:30, which was when we were supposed to start our pre-drinking for the night. The plan was to go to Bomber. I was supposed to eat at 5 so that I could start drinking at 7:30. Instead, I woke at 7:30, grab food at 7:45. Ate till 8 and went to Darren's by 8:15. I shouldn't have worried as Lan was still getting dressed by 8:15. We drank till around 9. At this point, with drinking games, Allen, Darren, Lan and I had 2 shots of Tequila each and a variety of mixed drinks. Allen kept on insisting he had more than 6, but not much more. We each had around 8 when we got there.
What happened that night stays with the people that night. Each has their own stories to tell and it is theirs to tell.
What happened to me that night was nothing. I hold my liquor well =P. Allen and Darren on the other hand, got thrown out for being too intoxicated. Ask them for their own stories.
There were other people too from our class, like Vani, Roma, Muzzafar, and Junette. Very interesting saturday.
Sunday was work day. Monday was pretty much another work day. And Today was google Talk day. Google hosted a meet and greet. It was interesting. Free food and supposedly a free t-shirt, but that never arrived. Lots of food and drink though. David, Colleen and I pretty much ate everything except pizza. There were icecream root beer floats, strawberry shakes, cheeseballs, sushi (crappy veggie rolls though), and pizza. There were crazy cookies on sticks, that had sugar paper on them. Basically edible paper pasted on the sugar cookies with the Google logo on it. It was cool. We went at around 4:30. Pretty much ate and talked until 6:00. And then now writing.
Anyways, that's what's going on so far. Not much eh?
I also won a T-shirt as one of the raffle draws. This occured right after I was looking at my ticket and saying that I had no chance. This was witnessed by Allen, who said that I was a very wrong man. I took his ticket and said the same thing (saying that his ticket had no chance) and he won a $25 dollar gift certificate right after. This did not work a third time for my other friend.
After that, I felt that I was drained and didn't want to go to Rev like we planned. Instead we went to Lan's place and had a few of the beers that we bought. David complained that we ditched him at this point. But I have to disagree. Since he was walking in front of us with Jane, the situation was that he ditched us and that he had no right to be angry. He said that he was searching for us for quite a while, but still his fault for walking too fast when you don't know the destination. After the drinking, we played around 2-3 hours of Smash Bros, before we went to sleep.
On saturday, I actually slept until 7:30, which was when we were supposed to start our pre-drinking for the night. The plan was to go to Bomber. I was supposed to eat at 5 so that I could start drinking at 7:30. Instead, I woke at 7:30, grab food at 7:45. Ate till 8 and went to Darren's by 8:15. I shouldn't have worried as Lan was still getting dressed by 8:15. We drank till around 9. At this point, with drinking games, Allen, Darren, Lan and I had 2 shots of Tequila each and a variety of mixed drinks. Allen kept on insisting he had more than 6, but not much more. We each had around 8 when we got there.
What happened that night stays with the people that night. Each has their own stories to tell and it is theirs to tell.
What happened to me that night was nothing. I hold my liquor well =P. Allen and Darren on the other hand, got thrown out for being too intoxicated. Ask them for their own stories.
There were other people too from our class, like Vani, Roma, Muzzafar, and Junette. Very interesting saturday.
Sunday was work day. Monday was pretty much another work day. And Today was google Talk day. Google hosted a meet and greet. It was interesting. Free food and supposedly a free t-shirt, but that never arrived. Lots of food and drink though. David, Colleen and I pretty much ate everything except pizza. There were icecream root beer floats, strawberry shakes, cheeseballs, sushi (crappy veggie rolls though), and pizza. There were crazy cookies on sticks, that had sugar paper on them. Basically edible paper pasted on the sugar cookies with the Google logo on it. It was cool. We went at around 4:30. Pretty much ate and talked until 6:00. And then now writing.
Anyways, that's what's going on so far. Not much eh?
Thursday, March 09, 2006
Still feeling sick.
Still feeling a bit sick, but I'm getting better. Been looking at some of the old stuff that I have, and some of the chat logs I have go all the way back to 2000. Wow. Six years ago. Has it been that long already?
I was talking to Jenny about university life, since her acceptances are coming in soon. And as a whole, I realize that girls seem to make friends more easily then guys. At least, in Waterloo. And that in Waterloo, you have two options, of having a really closeknit group of friends, no more than 5-6, or a large group of acquantainces, or at the very best, acquantaince friend level. For girls, they usually take the second route rather then the first, whereas most guys have different cliques depending on interest or adversity levels.
Riel 1/20/200 12:21 PM ------------ Wrote:
well.. depends on your personality... but i
would advise you to start talking to girl(s)
about personal stuff, like intimate... just
pretend as if you're doing it out of boredom
or curiosity, and get to know them on a deeper
level... and from their you can either find
out what they want, and match yourself to
fulfill that, or stick to who you are, and if
they don't like it, fuck em... ... hold on
Riel 1/20/200 12:21 PM ------------ Wrote:
yeah.... also if you're not going to be direct
about it, like not just go and ask them out,
if you're gonna go slow about it, don't make
it obvious that you're interested, at least
not too obvious... because it'll make the girl
uncomfortable or expectant...
Riel 1/20/200 12:21 PM ------------ Wrote:
there are 3 main styles that i can think of...
categorized as direct, desperate, and
long-term..
Riel 1/20/200 12:21 PM ------------ Wrote:
direct is usually from confident "hot" guys,
with lot's of self confidece and pickup
lines...
umm.. long term is like you're willing to put
a lot of time and effort into "creating" a
relationship, by being subtle, and caring, and
stuff like that... so by the time you actually
officially are going out, you've been really
close to that level for a while....
desperate is basically this is the only thing
you think about, and you want to spend all
your time with the girl.. and its important
not to let this show if this is in fact how
you are... from time to time, you have to
casually interact, or flirt with other girls
just to show that you're not dependent, and
you're not going to be pushed around and
stuff... or whipped as it is more commonly
known as...
Ha, so very very true in my observational experiences. So how does one use this knowledge? I don't know.
Mei! I actually found a snippet that said that you were either going to go to Engineering or Act Sci at UoT or Waterloo. In the end you went for neither. Liar =p.
Bah. As a read more and more of this, I realize how many things I expected and never achieved/deserved/got. And how much of a coward I am. UGGGH!
I also notice that I usually notice someone in the first few times I've met them, and then I never seem to do anything about it. So it was in HS, so it is in university. Sigh. What the hell am I trying to do here?
Wow...I don't even know what the hell I'm doing anymore. Got an hour before the lab. Fun.
I was talking to Jenny about university life, since her acceptances are coming in soon. And as a whole, I realize that girls seem to make friends more easily then guys. At least, in Waterloo. And that in Waterloo, you have two options, of having a really closeknit group of friends, no more than 5-6, or a large group of acquantainces, or at the very best, acquantaince friend level. For girls, they usually take the second route rather then the first, whereas most guys have different cliques depending on interest or adversity levels.
Riel 1/20/200 12:21 PM ------------ Wrote:
well.. depends on your personality... but i
would advise you to start talking to girl(s)
about personal stuff, like intimate... just
pretend as if you're doing it out of boredom
or curiosity, and get to know them on a deeper
level... and from their you can either find
out what they want, and match yourself to
fulfill that, or stick to who you are, and if
they don't like it, fuck em... ... hold on
Riel 1/20/200 12:21 PM ------------ Wrote:
yeah.... also if you're not going to be direct
about it, like not just go and ask them out,
if you're gonna go slow about it, don't make
it obvious that you're interested, at least
not too obvious... because it'll make the girl
uncomfortable or expectant...
Riel 1/20/200 12:21 PM ------------ Wrote:
there are 3 main styles that i can think of...
categorized as direct, desperate, and
long-term..
Riel 1/20/200 12:21 PM ------------ Wrote:
direct is usually from confident "hot" guys,
with lot's of self confidece and pickup
lines...
umm.. long term is like you're willing to put
a lot of time and effort into "creating" a
relationship, by being subtle, and caring, and
stuff like that... so by the time you actually
officially are going out, you've been really
close to that level for a while....
desperate is basically this is the only thing
you think about, and you want to spend all
your time with the girl.. and its important
not to let this show if this is in fact how
you are... from time to time, you have to
casually interact, or flirt with other girls
just to show that you're not dependent, and
you're not going to be pushed around and
stuff... or whipped as it is more commonly
known as...
Ha, so very very true in my observational experiences. So how does one use this knowledge? I don't know.
Mei! I actually found a snippet that said that you were either going to go to Engineering or Act Sci at UoT or Waterloo. In the end you went for neither. Liar =p.
Bah. As a read more and more of this, I realize how many things I expected and never achieved/deserved/got. And how much of a coward I am. UGGGH!
I also notice that I usually notice someone in the first few times I've met them, and then I never seem to do anything about it. So it was in HS, so it is in university. Sigh. What the hell am I trying to do here?
Wow...I don't even know what the hell I'm doing anymore. Got an hour before the lab. Fun.
Wednesday, March 08, 2006
Sick
Well, I'm sick. But I find funny crap all the time. Here's a cool thing: A real chicken that survived a decapitation. It's a headless chicken!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mike_the_Headless_Chicken
Very interesting.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mike_the_Headless_Chicken
Very interesting.
Viral survey helps laziness
So instead of actually writing, I'll just fill out this survey that other people I tag should fill out in their blogs.
Four jobs I've had:
1. Research Assistant - York University
2. Troubleshooter - Solectron
3. Hardware Tester - ATI
4. Research Experimenter - NDI
Four movies I can watch (and have the potential to watch) over and over:
1. Laputa
2. 10 Things I hate about you
3. Garden State
4. Van Wilder
Four places I've lived (if vacations don't count):
1. Hong Kong
2. Greater Toronto Area
3. Waterloo
4. Greater Toronto Area (Downtown). (Adding the word downtown always makes it different. Wouldn't GTA be different if it was labelled GTA:Downtown.)
Four TV Shows I love(d):
1. Scrubs
2. Two guys, a girl, and a pizza place
3. CSI (Original)
4. Corner Gas
Four places I've vacationed:
1. Orlando, Florida
2. Hong Kong
3. Thailand
4. New York
Four of my favorite dishes:
1. Lobster
2. Fresh sushi and sashimi (in particular, Salmon Roe)
3. Ribs (good ribs, with the bones still have marrow in them, to show they're not dried out)
4. Asparagus (in some kind of sauce)
Four sites I visit daily:
1. Blogs
2. Webcomics
3. Cooking for Engineers
4. Wikipedia
Four places I would rather be right now:
1. The End of Time
2. Nowhere
3. Everywhere
4. The beginning of the end.
Four bloggers I'm tagging:
1. Matthew
2. Lisha
3. Jason Pang (you're bored. here's something to do!)
4. Roma
anyways...here's to night! I think I have a stupid cold now though.
Four jobs I've had:
1. Research Assistant - York University
2. Troubleshooter - Solectron
3. Hardware Tester - ATI
4. Research Experimenter - NDI
Four movies I can watch (and have the potential to watch) over and over:
1. Laputa
2. 10 Things I hate about you
3. Garden State
4. Van Wilder
Four places I've lived (if vacations don't count):
1. Hong Kong
2. Greater Toronto Area
3. Waterloo
4. Greater Toronto Area (Downtown). (Adding the word downtown always makes it different. Wouldn't GTA be different if it was labelled GTA:Downtown.)
Four TV Shows I love(d):
1. Scrubs
2. Two guys, a girl, and a pizza place
3. CSI (Original)
4. Corner Gas
Four places I've vacationed:
1. Orlando, Florida
2. Hong Kong
3. Thailand
4. New York
Four of my favorite dishes:
1. Lobster
2. Fresh sushi and sashimi (in particular, Salmon Roe)
3. Ribs (good ribs, with the bones still have marrow in them, to show they're not dried out)
4. Asparagus (in some kind of sauce)
Four sites I visit daily:
1. Blogs
2. Webcomics
3. Cooking for Engineers
4. Wikipedia
Four places I would rather be right now:
1. The End of Time
2. Nowhere
3. Everywhere
4. The beginning of the end.
Four bloggers I'm tagging:
1. Matthew
2. Lisha
3. Jason Pang (you're bored. here's something to do!)
4. Roma
anyways...here's to night! I think I have a stupid cold now though.
Tuesday, March 07, 2006
Time for more self-indulgent crap
I don't have anything new to read. This is bad.
This, my friends, is akin to a television addict without anything new to watch. My brain is going numb from the fact that I haven't had a chance to expand my imaginations for a while. Finding good fiction is always such a chore.
Instead, to fill my lack of reading materials, I'm back to playing non-stop video games. This is very bad.
I've noticed that I like the night time, only because it is the time when the air is cool and crisp, without the scents of human inhabitation. During twilight or even as late as 9 oclock, the air smells like dinner cooking or pizzas from across the street. But at this late at night, it is fresh and naturally crisp and sharp.
I also now lack the motivation to do anything related to schoolwork. I'm now 2 weeks behind (since midterms were 2 weeks ago). I guess its time to pick up the pace once again.
And why am I still up? I slept from 11-2am. I don't know...
This, my friends, is akin to a television addict without anything new to watch. My brain is going numb from the fact that I haven't had a chance to expand my imaginations for a while. Finding good fiction is always such a chore.
Instead, to fill my lack of reading materials, I'm back to playing non-stop video games. This is very bad.
I've noticed that I like the night time, only because it is the time when the air is cool and crisp, without the scents of human inhabitation. During twilight or even as late as 9 oclock, the air smells like dinner cooking or pizzas from across the street. But at this late at night, it is fresh and naturally crisp and sharp.
I also now lack the motivation to do anything related to schoolwork. I'm now 2 weeks behind (since midterms were 2 weeks ago). I guess its time to pick up the pace once again.
And why am I still up? I slept from 11-2am. I don't know...
Sunday, March 05, 2006
3 days without a post
Yup. I got lazy. Actually, I decided to force myself to write something else in the meantime. Hopefully, I'd get the motivation to make myself finish it. So far, it doesn't seem like its gone very far, but maybe this time it'll be finished. I doubt it though, since it will be at least a two year project.
Anyways, haven't been doing much. Just been lazying around and playing smash bros. melee with Darrick, Allen, Darren and Ammon. I seem to be getting worse as I play. This is also happening in DOTA (warcraft 3 custom map) which makes me wonder... am I getting old?
Labs, labs, and more labs. Got 3 next week and I still got a prelab and a postlab to write. Fun!
So yesterday, I was playing smash bros. with Darren in his lounge. Suddenly, these two girls, Maggie and Julie, and a guy (never did get his name.) came in and they were commenting on how we were playing smash bros. We graciously allow them to join us. Apparently, I was just guessing what year they were in, and I guess right! (second years). However, I got the faculty wrong (I guessed Accountancy, and the two girls were science and the guy was Syde.) Since they were in science, I had a sinking suspicion that they were friends of my sister. I asked them, and it turns out that they were...and that they just came from a party where she was mixing drinks (apparently, my sister can mix drinks. I need her to make me a Bloody Caeser sometime). What a small world this is.
I don't know why, but since I'm coming from Darren's place late every night (since I wake up around 4-5, go play for a bit/eat, go to their place at 9, work till 1-2 (or play smash) and then go home. Since I'm walking home at 1-2, there's usually a cool brisk wind. The star's are out, and the moon is at the top of the sky, like a mystical sign that's depicting the answer to all of life's answers. It feels extremely comfortable and it feels so carefree. I don't know why I love the mystery and the atmosphere of the night, but it is extremely relaxing and sometimes I wish I could experience that atmosphere forever. I wonder if I'm turning into a vampire or something =p.
Anyways, not much to say right now. Thank you to to people that are reading this. It's always nice to know people are reading what I write. I feel important now =P. 2 more people linked (Edmund and Roma).
Just drank 2 cups (everyone that's seem my cup, knows its 500mL, 2 of your usual puny cups) of Ovaltine, 1/4 2L bucket of Chapman's frozen yogurt, and a cup of green tea (Thanks again Ammon, for the tea leaves). Now, add in the fact that I'm semi-lactose intolerant (stomach problems), this is now turning into a very stupid idea. As well, I should have removed the tea leaves before I added the yogurt to the green tea. Those leaves get into the frozen yogurt =/. And the ratio of frozen yogurt to green tea should probably have been higher. Oh well, live and learn. It was still pretty good, even though I should have removed the stupid tea leaves first. ooo....my stomach. At 4:00am. I really should learn time and place to do stuff. Like everything else in life. Sigh.
Kenny and Jian are playing Big 2 online on the Chinese Yahoo network. With the f-word and the p-word (the dirty word that's synonymous with both a cat and female genitalia) flying around (all from Jian's mouth), it is kind of hard to sleep. He's been saying "Daddy wants to f--- some newbs" for a while now. I wonder when he's ever going to do it instead of talking about it. Sigh, and you wonder why I go over to Darren's place so much =p.
Anyways, enough ranting. A good night to all and to all a good night!
Anyways, haven't been doing much. Just been lazying around and playing smash bros. melee with Darrick, Allen, Darren and Ammon. I seem to be getting worse as I play. This is also happening in DOTA (warcraft 3 custom map) which makes me wonder... am I getting old?
Labs, labs, and more labs. Got 3 next week and I still got a prelab and a postlab to write. Fun!
So yesterday, I was playing smash bros. with Darren in his lounge. Suddenly, these two girls, Maggie and Julie, and a guy (never did get his name.) came in and they were commenting on how we were playing smash bros. We graciously allow them to join us. Apparently, I was just guessing what year they were in, and I guess right! (second years). However, I got the faculty wrong (I guessed Accountancy, and the two girls were science and the guy was Syde.) Since they were in science, I had a sinking suspicion that they were friends of my sister. I asked them, and it turns out that they were...and that they just came from a party where she was mixing drinks (apparently, my sister can mix drinks. I need her to make me a Bloody Caeser sometime). What a small world this is.
I don't know why, but since I'm coming from Darren's place late every night (since I wake up around 4-5, go play for a bit/eat, go to their place at 9, work till 1-2 (or play smash) and then go home. Since I'm walking home at 1-2, there's usually a cool brisk wind. The star's are out, and the moon is at the top of the sky, like a mystical sign that's depicting the answer to all of life's answers. It feels extremely comfortable and it feels so carefree. I don't know why I love the mystery and the atmosphere of the night, but it is extremely relaxing and sometimes I wish I could experience that atmosphere forever. I wonder if I'm turning into a vampire or something =p.
Anyways, not much to say right now. Thank you to to people that are reading this. It's always nice to know people are reading what I write. I feel important now =P. 2 more people linked (Edmund and Roma).
Just drank 2 cups (everyone that's seem my cup, knows its 500mL, 2 of your usual puny cups) of Ovaltine, 1/4 2L bucket of Chapman's frozen yogurt, and a cup of green tea (Thanks again Ammon, for the tea leaves). Now, add in the fact that I'm semi-lactose intolerant (stomach problems), this is now turning into a very stupid idea. As well, I should have removed the tea leaves before I added the yogurt to the green tea. Those leaves get into the frozen yogurt =/. And the ratio of frozen yogurt to green tea should probably have been higher. Oh well, live and learn. It was still pretty good, even though I should have removed the stupid tea leaves first. ooo....my stomach. At 4:00am. I really should learn time and place to do stuff. Like everything else in life. Sigh.
Kenny and Jian are playing Big 2 online on the Chinese Yahoo network. With the f-word and the p-word (the dirty word that's synonymous with both a cat and female genitalia) flying around (all from Jian's mouth), it is kind of hard to sleep. He's been saying "Daddy wants to f--- some newbs" for a while now. I wonder when he's ever going to do it instead of talking about it. Sigh, and you wonder why I go over to Darren's place so much =p.
Anyways, enough ranting. A good night to all and to all a good night!
Thursday, March 02, 2006
Okay...Can't sleep. I'm screwed.
I have no clue why, I get frequent bouts of insomnia whenever something I want to go smoothly occurs the next day. Then I lack sleep and usually screw some part of it up. Tomorrow is my midterm, so I guess that counts for 1 bout of insomnia. Go screwed up brain! Eating frosted flakes right now.
Anyways, Ammon, Darren and I were discussing whether compressing the curriculum of high school from 5 years to 4 years was of benefit. This came from the observations we have made on the people entering university for the Engineering programs. They are retarded (in our opinion. Granted, all you young'uns seem so stupid to us). Well, com'on, 50% of the people failing software eng? The fact that we can do a simple search on google and find the paper you 'wrote' yourself? What followed was basically two hours of BS from eight thirty all the way to ten thirty that would do con men proud. The gist of this was this:
Ammon argues that cutting five years to four years was the bad way to go.
Darren argues that cutting five years to four years makes no major difference and therefore the money could be used elsewhere better.
I argue that it doesn't really matter. It doesn't make any major difference and the reason that the children (that's write, you young'uns are all children) are stupid is because of the cultural changes of technology and the reliance they have on instantaneous gratification of information especially from the Internet.
In the end, we concluded that Ammon didn't really think that the new curriculum was bad. He just felt that it could be better by changing the old five year curriculum rather than compressing it as well. Because the only two options were cutting it or leaving the curriculum as is, he was defending a position that did not exist.
Anyways...that was boring to most people that don't care. So let us go on to another topic.
Lan suggested that I care about this blog too much. It may be true. I kind of like to write stuff if I don't have to follow up and edit it afterwards. Since this is a rant, I don't think I would edit it. Thus it is immensely enjoyable. As for my novel, it is still going nowhere. I haven't worked on it for 2 years and I still only have 7 pages. I should work on it, but... sigh...laziness prevails.
Oh right, I slept a lot today. I slept from 1:30 to 4:30 as an afternoon nap for no reason (considering I had 8 hours of sleep). What followed was a dream that involved Vicky, Darren, Britney, the TTC (or some type of subway), Squid, cooking, fighting, and taking the wrong train. Weird dream. There was some famous cook that was supposed to teach me, but he ended up teaching Britney how to cook instead. Weird.
Damn, these frosted flakes doesn't seem frosted. =/ No sugar. Guess I'll do a bit more 380 (I don't know why since I already did all the homework. Practice I guess?) It doesn't say 50% less sugar damn it. I want sweeter corn flakes!
Oh right, Lan's blog (which has been inactive for several months, but she updated recently!) is now linked!
Hmm...more rambly goodness.
Now, Ammon's argument was basically this. By having 5 years of high school, one would be free to take extra courses to decide what we would want to do in life better than if one only have four years of cramming. I doubt it. Most people are lazy by nature and for the majority of students, it would be a waste. And besides, a few more courses won't hurt, but it won't help greatly to help people decide what they want to do in life. University courses are also vastly different from the ones in high school. Accountancy for one, is much different in the university and the work force, then the courses taught in high school. And those people that would make use of that extra year of high school are the people that would probably have taken all those courses in high school in four years. He thinks that taking humanities courses would help people be more well-rounded and learn to at least present an argument. Maybe, but I'm a skeptic about that. I really think that the kids nowadays are spoiled as the result of the internet. They rely on instantaneous information and believe for the most part that information that is not readily accessible is not worthwhile. I know many 'kids' (a year or two younger then I am, but still!) that look to wikipedia as their only source of information (and slashdot, but I'm an old geezer and don't read slashdot). And why is it that only kids from the 2009/2010 class have facebook accounts? Are we, the old generation (old is relative I feel, and I feel old), that out of the loop? I guess even a few years now changes the attitude that was have with technology.
I don't know. But seriously...50% failure rate? And you got into Waterloo? To think that 4 years ago I was scared of not getting in. Now...I'm kind of ashamed. Kids, you guys better get your act together or I'll have to wave my cane at you. Metaphorically of course. I don't have money for a cane. I'm a poor university student.
Corn flakes done! Back to studying.
Anyways, Ammon, Darren and I were discussing whether compressing the curriculum of high school from 5 years to 4 years was of benefit. This came from the observations we have made on the people entering university for the Engineering programs. They are retarded (in our opinion. Granted, all you young'uns seem so stupid to us). Well, com'on, 50% of the people failing software eng? The fact that we can do a simple search on google and find the paper you 'wrote' yourself? What followed was basically two hours of BS from eight thirty all the way to ten thirty that would do con men proud. The gist of this was this:
Ammon argues that cutting five years to four years was the bad way to go.
Darren argues that cutting five years to four years makes no major difference and therefore the money could be used elsewhere better.
I argue that it doesn't really matter. It doesn't make any major difference and the reason that the children (that's write, you young'uns are all children) are stupid is because of the cultural changes of technology and the reliance they have on instantaneous gratification of information especially from the Internet.
In the end, we concluded that Ammon didn't really think that the new curriculum was bad. He just felt that it could be better by changing the old five year curriculum rather than compressing it as well. Because the only two options were cutting it or leaving the curriculum as is, he was defending a position that did not exist.
Anyways...that was boring to most people that don't care. So let us go on to another topic.
Lan suggested that I care about this blog too much. It may be true. I kind of like to write stuff if I don't have to follow up and edit it afterwards. Since this is a rant, I don't think I would edit it. Thus it is immensely enjoyable. As for my novel, it is still going nowhere. I haven't worked on it for 2 years and I still only have 7 pages. I should work on it, but... sigh...laziness prevails.
Oh right, I slept a lot today. I slept from 1:30 to 4:30 as an afternoon nap for no reason (considering I had 8 hours of sleep). What followed was a dream that involved Vicky, Darren, Britney, the TTC (or some type of subway), Squid, cooking, fighting, and taking the wrong train. Weird dream. There was some famous cook that was supposed to teach me, but he ended up teaching Britney how to cook instead. Weird.
Damn, these frosted flakes doesn't seem frosted. =/ No sugar. Guess I'll do a bit more 380 (I don't know why since I already did all the homework. Practice I guess?) It doesn't say 50% less sugar damn it. I want sweeter corn flakes!
Oh right, Lan's blog (which has been inactive for several months, but she updated recently!) is now linked!
Hmm...more rambly goodness.
Now, Ammon's argument was basically this. By having 5 years of high school, one would be free to take extra courses to decide what we would want to do in life better than if one only have four years of cramming. I doubt it. Most people are lazy by nature and for the majority of students, it would be a waste. And besides, a few more courses won't hurt, but it won't help greatly to help people decide what they want to do in life. University courses are also vastly different from the ones in high school. Accountancy for one, is much different in the university and the work force, then the courses taught in high school. And those people that would make use of that extra year of high school are the people that would probably have taken all those courses in high school in four years. He thinks that taking humanities courses would help people be more well-rounded and learn to at least present an argument. Maybe, but I'm a skeptic about that. I really think that the kids nowadays are spoiled as the result of the internet. They rely on instantaneous information and believe for the most part that information that is not readily accessible is not worthwhile. I know many 'kids' (a year or two younger then I am, but still!) that look to wikipedia as their only source of information (and slashdot, but I'm an old geezer and don't read slashdot). And why is it that only kids from the 2009/2010 class have facebook accounts? Are we, the old generation (old is relative I feel, and I feel old), that out of the loop? I guess even a few years now changes the attitude that was have with technology.
I don't know. But seriously...50% failure rate? And you got into Waterloo? To think that 4 years ago I was scared of not getting in. Now...I'm kind of ashamed. Kids, you guys better get your act together or I'll have to wave my cane at you. Metaphorically of course. I don't have money for a cane. I'm a poor university student.
Corn flakes done! Back to studying.
Exam tomorrow!
The postphoned 380 midterm is tomorrow and I feel so unprepared =/. I don't even have an excuse. This is probably very bad. So I'll go to sleep and try to forget about it.
Had a long interesting argument about whether OAC or the new curriculum is better. I'll write most of it down tomorrow. To sleep everyone, to sleep!
Thanks Roma. This is pretty much a rant board. I agree.
Had a long interesting argument about whether OAC or the new curriculum is better. I'll write most of it down tomorrow. To sleep everyone, to sleep!
Thanks Roma. This is pretty much a rant board. I agree.
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